Characher 'Dilli' hai

My dad being in paramilitary has had a transferable job, far flung places which you would have never heard of, I have spent good part of my growing years in these places. I never knew what to say when someone asked me which city you belong to, both my parents are from different cities, I belong to neither.

I am not romanticizing the menaces of a fauji’s daughter. In a way, it was fun new place, new girl in the school, scenic camps, lots of outdoors. Then Delhi happened to the 'cityless girl' , unlike other city who pushed me out after 3 years , Delhi hugged me tightly made me stay for good 10 years.

As I moved out of Delhi for my post-graduation and now my job, there is a part of Delhi in me. People often ask me , especially now that I am in Bangalore , why are you hung upon Delhi ? They have valid reasons for their question, people in Bangalore are not killed for collecting toll or refusing to serve liquor post the allowable limit, you don’t sweat half the year, nor do you shiver in winters, you can easily take a rick after a late night movie, you get the best coffees, you don’t worry about pick pockets in public transport, it's not i seismic zone 4 , city no doubt has been a warm host.

But how do I explain Delhi to people who haven’t experienced it. It’s like attempting to explain different shades of purple to a blind , different ragas to a deaf, internet to papa ( he still calls his email as his web site ). Delhi lets me be her husband, her daughter, her friend, her secret keeper, her lover and also her enemy all at the same time.

Bangalore would never tell me her secrets, because I would never understand her language. Bangalore can never offer me a cup of tea at India Gate while watching the 26 January parade preparation on a winter morning , khullar ki laassi at Delhi 6 , the luxury to bargain in lajpat nagar , IT capital doesn’t have a Nehru Place , tailors don’t understand the difference between a patiala and a pajama , the humble city doesn’t really take my colorful dressing without stares , red light free ring road , junk jewelry of janpath , parathas of moolchand , well connected public transport , golgappe of Bengali sweets , my engineering college , Keveter’s milk shake followed by pastry at Wenger’s , an evening at central park ,trade fair in November , fruit beer at Delhi haat , my growing up buddies , my parent’s warmth …..

I owe my little street smartness by Delhi standard and a lot by Bangalore standard to my teacher Delhi. Whichever city I go to , I know I will manage because I am a Delhite. Bangalore is like my extra marital affair, but Delhi is my law fully wedded wife. I am waiting for my wife to get jealous and call me back , till that time I will enjoy with my extra marital partner J.

Delhi reveals her true self to selected few, to outsiders she feigns to be disgusting, I am fortunate that I am among those few blessed people in world to whom the city has revealed herself.

Blissfullness of being a woman

As I look over an aerobics class in office, intuitively I find the lone guy in class as a ‘misfit’ in session. I wonder why is it that perceived feminine activities like yoga, aerobics, skipping, shopping are a complete no no for men while perceived male activities like gyming , basketball, martial arts are acceptable or rather cool when performed by women.

Answer how so ever unfair but is the reality “The world is biased towards us” ( why not after all we are the fairer , smarter specie :P). The choices, be it the activities or dress or career or studies are always more of us. We can choose to be a home maker concerned about the family who has sacrificed her career or a working mother doing the multitasking of efficiently managing work and house. While for the lesser fortunate beings , I mean the males , the idea of being a homemaker is surely going to attract a lot of stares and also the risk of being termed as ‘good for nothing’, even if he manages to balance house and work this unfair world won’t give him the credit.

We can wear feminine wear like salwar suit, sari or we can wear trousers and shirts, umpteen options to choose from. I need to even mention the consequences if the lesser fortunate beings happen to wear anything else other then the limited one or two option they have. I can buy a pink car as easily as a black one , I can ride a scooty as well as a bike , I can earn and yet take money from lesser fortunates.

Reserved seats in public transport, paid bills on dates, reserved seats in colleges and public offices, better looks, more attention, more demand are some among the infinite advantages of being a woman.

Emotional as I am, my heart cries for the atrocities one has to face being a male. I look for answers to explain this bias, I revisit the Upanishads course I took in my post graduation. I find the reason for their current state is none other than ‘karma’ , it is their past karma that they will have to repay in this life time.

But as the more fortunate specie we have a responsibility to make a better world bearable) for the less fortunate ones, to make them feel significant we the female fraternity feigns of being poor drivers, possessing no direction sense, poor at mathematics. In return we get those looks from the lesser fortunate ones ‘one area where we can prove our existence’, sole look of winning on your faces, even though we achieve it after unpretentious underplay of our skills makes our day .


" A man on date wonders whether he will get lucky , a woman already knows "

Things which I have learnt from satviki

Remember the time when we use to laugh gregariously, when we used to cry loudly enough that even our neighbours could hear, and we would dance at any song, when we would run when we could walk? It's been so long that I don't remember it clearly. But seeing my niece I can surely recollect it. There is so much to learn from a child. She will give you that priceless smile of her every time you call her or look at her. Every time when you come back home she would get so excited to see you and one look at her all your tiredness goes off. She is just 14 months old and needless to say she doesn't know how to talk. When you don't know words you express more through the expressions and emotions. As we grow the words emotions replaces the expression, smile replaces a gregarious laugh, walking replaces running, foot tap replaces dance.

But we have named her Sativiki which is pure and I hope she lives up to her name and remain unadulterated. I wish she always welcomes me the way she does now. I wish she doesn't lose her enthusiasm as she grows. I wish (much to her mother's wishes as well ;)) that she would dance whenever she wishes to.

Irrespective whether my wish is fulfilled or not she would always be my little darling who claps every time when I sing her “when you happy and you know clap your hand” :) .

Common Pleasures

Its been quiet awhile since I wrote something. What incited me to write this blog was a simple line that I read somewhere. Here goes the line “He'd usually stamp on the piles of leaves on the footpath to hear them crunch under his shoes”. My topic for the blog today is “Common Pleasures” . Common because I am sure that most of us have experienced the pleasures from the simple thing. Even now when I recall them they bring a smile on my face. So here is the list of common pleasures

1 Fun Clips does that ring a bell somewhere…. I remember stacking them all my fingers and then relishing them slowly one by one. I couldn’t finish them all at once since my sister would then tempt me with her remaining stock. More then the taste it was the idea of eating them on fingers that excited us.

2 When was the last time you had a cream roll ? I know most of my memories are associated with food . But I really relish those childhood memories of mine where I imagined myself all grown up and having cream rolls for breakfast lunch dinner everyday. I thought I will have to work really hard to achieve that lifestyle.Kids have amazing imagination.

3 I am sure we all as a kid were enticed by our mom to have disguised milk served to us as tea. When I was served one I demanded some ‘bakery biscuits ‘ with it. I remember the struggle of having the dipped biscuit without having it dissolve. It was one of those big things on which you felt proud as kids.

4 This I can bet that every gal has done as a child. Playing ghar ghar. I am not sure whether this generation does it or not. But in our time it was mandatory for girls to play ghar ghar irrespective of how much of a tom boy you were. There would a (many)kitchen sets which we would arrange and then come up with a script , proper characterization and instant dialogues. One was not suppose to laugh since most the times we played adults and adults were those serious types who rarely laughed.

5. It was the time before the low cost aero planes divorced the distance from time. It was the time when you spent your summer vacation at your grandparents house. It was the time when there no balley classes, painting classes , dance classes for children. So in our two months long vacation we went to our grandparents by train. During the journey we coaxed our parents to buy chacha Chaudhary,billu,pinki and champak.

6 Name,Place,Animal,Thing. How many times have I played that game and since how long I haven’t played that game ?

7 yeh anek kya hain didi ?
anek yani bahut saare....
bahut saare, kya bahut saare?
acha, batatee hoon...

suraj ek...
chanda ek.....
taare anek..

Do I need to explain this to 80’s born Indian?


8 Cassettes its been ages since I saw one in this digital age. I remember when I used to keep a part of my pocket money for buying various cool cassettes of the time Saturday Night and Sexy Eyeeees Sexy Sexy Eyes and of course Aqua’s Album. I am sure all of us rember this . All day and night... Whoa...you got the FM music playin. AIR FM Studio...all the time...on ALL INDIA RADIO.....


Keep adding more :) 

Hum Hindustani

God has been grateful to me. I am born in a good family, I have good friends but most importantly I am born as an Indian. I am not saying because of Patriotic influx of feeling on the eve of Independence Day. I am saying this because Indians are by default spoilt for the choices. Although in most case you make choose something out the choices available, we don’t , we just embrace all the choices. I have the choice to wear a sari, salwar suit, skirt, trousers and shirt, business suit , I wear all of them without feeling out of place in any of them. I can speak hindi and comfortably switch to English when I like, I haven’t chosen any of them, I have open heartedly embraced both of them. For sweets we just don’t have 51 varieties of ice creams and cakes, we have 51 varieties of sweets/mithais whose ingredients are totally different from one another and not just the flavor. In relations we just don’t have uncles and aunts we have chha, chachi, tau, tai mausi, mausa, bua,fufa.I am spoilt because I can go to any of my neighbors ( we don’t just have one neighbor we have neighbors) without a prior appointment. We just don't have the festival season during the year end, we have it through out the year. I savour equally a sawai made at my muslim friend's place, cake at a Christian friend’s place, mithai at my place, halwa at a sikh friend’s place on our festivals(its not just theirs its ours). I am spoilt because of my nationality .

I am born in a country which enriched with multiple costumes , languages , literature , art , dress , manners. We are used to seeing variety , color in our everyday life. I ask to be born as an Indian in my next life and the lives after that.

Lets play Holi with life :)

I believe in myself. I believe in his gift, that’s why I think I am special."The hardest thing is to be yourself in a world that is trying it's best, day and night, to make you like everyone else” E.E. Cummings. Once we start believing in ourselves, appreciating our capabilities, accepting our limitations, we then start investing our energy, time and resources in doing what we want to do rather then aping what every one else is doing. There is a dearth of originals in this world. We were all unique when we were born, but somehow the world colors us in its color as we grow. We start living in the illusion that more we will look like this world the more we will succeed. But this thinking has bereft the variety in this world. We all look alike, dress alike, do the same things, go to the same places, even the places look alike (go to any mall anywhere all look the same).There is a clear logical flaw in this argument. We don't have put any effort to look like this world. The world does it automatically, effort is required in maintaing our unique identity.How can we achieve success in doing something which doesn't require any effort from our side. Need of the hour is out of box thinking, which we all did when we were kids. Remember we had our unique games, our rooms were different and so were our stories. Lets splash some color in this world, be your selves . “But how do I believe in myself?” is the obvious question that arises. We will have to first know ourselves. This is the biggest hurdle; sages have spent their life time in knowing themselves. But this doesn’t mean that we have go to Himalayas to meditate in order to understand who we are. It is a gradual process which starts with acceptance. We have to accept who we are. Acceptance is the key for the door which embarks our journey in knowing ourselves. Believe me, there is pure enlightenment in this path.

Fervent Prayer

I wish I had learned those Sanskrit chants which have powers to coerce the Rain God. I wish I had known those tribal dance which could invoke the Rain. I wish I wasn't born as a muggle but as a wizard ,I would then just gesture towards the sky with my wand and say some Rain spell.

Why are Delhites being deprived of an afternoon of rain beating against windows, "gilli mitti's"(sounds lot better then wet mud) fragrance,samosa and pakora's evening? Its only in the rainy season I feel like having a cup of masala tea. There is a sense of adventure in managing to have a biscuit dipped in hot tea without letting the biscuit dissolve(I end up having a beige mush at the bottom of my cup) .For Semi atheists (which includes me) it was through rain that God revealed himself. Rain was my moment of faith and certainty in the existence of God. If you think of it, God has managed a prayer from a semi atheist(although its in a blog but technically it is a prayer).OK I give up , I believe in your existence. Now please Indraji(deity of rainfall) bestow some rain upon parched Delhi ,Ameen.