Characher 'Dilli' hai

My dad being in paramilitary has had a transferable job, far flung places which you would have never heard of, I have spent good part of my growing years in these places. I never knew what to say when someone asked me which city you belong to, both my parents are from different cities, I belong to neither.

I am not romanticizing the menaces of a fauji’s daughter. In a way, it was fun new place, new girl in the school, scenic camps, lots of outdoors. Then Delhi happened to the 'cityless girl' , unlike other city who pushed me out after 3 years , Delhi hugged me tightly made me stay for good 10 years.

As I moved out of Delhi for my post-graduation and now my job, there is a part of Delhi in me. People often ask me , especially now that I am in Bangalore , why are you hung upon Delhi ? They have valid reasons for their question, people in Bangalore are not killed for collecting toll or refusing to serve liquor post the allowable limit, you don’t sweat half the year, nor do you shiver in winters, you can easily take a rick after a late night movie, you get the best coffees, you don’t worry about pick pockets in public transport, it's not i seismic zone 4 , city no doubt has been a warm host.

But how do I explain Delhi to people who haven’t experienced it. It’s like attempting to explain different shades of purple to a blind , different ragas to a deaf, internet to papa ( he still calls his email as his web site ). Delhi lets me be her husband, her daughter, her friend, her secret keeper, her lover and also her enemy all at the same time.

Bangalore would never tell me her secrets, because I would never understand her language. Bangalore can never offer me a cup of tea at India Gate while watching the 26 January parade preparation on a winter morning , khullar ki laassi at Delhi 6 , the luxury to bargain in lajpat nagar , IT capital doesn’t have a Nehru Place , tailors don’t understand the difference between a patiala and a pajama , the humble city doesn’t really take my colorful dressing without stares , red light free ring road , junk jewelry of janpath , parathas of moolchand , well connected public transport , golgappe of Bengali sweets , my engineering college , Keveter’s milk shake followed by pastry at Wenger’s , an evening at central park ,trade fair in November , fruit beer at Delhi haat , my growing up buddies , my parent’s warmth …..

I owe my little street smartness by Delhi standard and a lot by Bangalore standard to my teacher Delhi. Whichever city I go to , I know I will manage because I am a Delhite. Bangalore is like my extra marital affair, but Delhi is my law fully wedded wife. I am waiting for my wife to get jealous and call me back , till that time I will enjoy with my extra marital partner J.

Delhi reveals her true self to selected few, to outsiders she feigns to be disgusting, I am fortunate that I am among those few blessed people in world to whom the city has revealed herself.

Blissfullness of being a woman

As I look over an aerobics class in office, intuitively I find the lone guy in class as a ‘misfit’ in session. I wonder why is it that perceived feminine activities like yoga, aerobics, skipping, shopping are a complete no no for men while perceived male activities like gyming , basketball, martial arts are acceptable or rather cool when performed by women.

Answer how so ever unfair but is the reality “The world is biased towards us” ( why not after all we are the fairer , smarter specie :P). The choices, be it the activities or dress or career or studies are always more of us. We can choose to be a home maker concerned about the family who has sacrificed her career or a working mother doing the multitasking of efficiently managing work and house. While for the lesser fortunate beings , I mean the males , the idea of being a homemaker is surely going to attract a lot of stares and also the risk of being termed as ‘good for nothing’, even if he manages to balance house and work this unfair world won’t give him the credit.

We can wear feminine wear like salwar suit, sari or we can wear trousers and shirts, umpteen options to choose from. I need to even mention the consequences if the lesser fortunate beings happen to wear anything else other then the limited one or two option they have. I can buy a pink car as easily as a black one , I can ride a scooty as well as a bike , I can earn and yet take money from lesser fortunates.

Reserved seats in public transport, paid bills on dates, reserved seats in colleges and public offices, better looks, more attention, more demand are some among the infinite advantages of being a woman.

Emotional as I am, my heart cries for the atrocities one has to face being a male. I look for answers to explain this bias, I revisit the Upanishads course I took in my post graduation. I find the reason for their current state is none other than ‘karma’ , it is their past karma that they will have to repay in this life time.

But as the more fortunate specie we have a responsibility to make a better world bearable) for the less fortunate ones, to make them feel significant we the female fraternity feigns of being poor drivers, possessing no direction sense, poor at mathematics. In return we get those looks from the lesser fortunate ones ‘one area where we can prove our existence’, sole look of winning on your faces, even though we achieve it after unpretentious underplay of our skills makes our day .


" A man on date wonders whether he will get lucky , a woman already knows "